{"id":532,"date":"2008-08-26T08:09:41","date_gmt":"2008-08-26T08:09:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/10.131.168.108\/wordpress\/?p=532"},"modified":"2008-08-26T08:09:41","modified_gmt":"2008-08-26T08:09:41","slug":"down","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/elhogue.com\/shannah\/2008\/08\/26\/down\/","title":{"rendered":"Down"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Today I&#8217;m sort of down.&nbsp; And I have nothing else to blog about, so here&#8217;s my list of things I&#8217;m whining to myself about right now.&nbsp; I will get over it.&nbsp; But if you&#8217;re hoping for a happy blog, don&#8217;t read this one today!<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>I realized yesterday that I&#8217;m desperately lonely.&nbsp; I am aching for connection.&nbsp; Real interaction.&nbsp; Something that I was expecting to get over the weekend (when I actually had social activities planned) and didn&#8217;t.&nbsp; Can&#8217;t really explain it other than that. &nbsp;  <\/li>\n<li>This week, the reality of leaving CU finally hit me. They&#8217;re moving on without me; I know they miss me, but they don&#8217;t need me.&nbsp;&nbsp; And now everyone&#8217;s starting back to school (I know a ton of teachers), and I&#8217;m not.&nbsp; I&#8217;m sitting at home.&nbsp; All of this is as it should be.&nbsp; But it hurts today.&nbsp; I miss being important. <\/li>\n<li>I don&#8217;t know if you other twin moms ever felt this way, but all of a sudden, I feel like a freak show.&nbsp; Instead of having conversations with people on the rare occasions that I do get together with them (like church), we only have enough time to cover the &#8220;How are you feeling?&nbsp; How are the babies?&nbsp; How big are you getting?!?&#8221; questions.&nbsp; It&#8217;s starting to feel as if I show up places just so people can get their once-a-week fix of gaping at my belly.&nbsp; (Of course, that is unfair.&nbsp; They are genuinely interested, I know.&nbsp; And I love my friends dearly.&nbsp; This is just how I feel today&#8230;remember, I&#8217;m whining.)<\/li>\n<li>I miss being me.&nbsp; I miss being able to snuggle with my husband easily.&nbsp; I miss being able to do whatever I want around the house.&nbsp; I miss being able to do the chores on my to-do list without running out of energy or losing focus.&nbsp; I miss having things to talk about.&nbsp; I miss having opportunities to just chat and catch up with people. I miss having people to chat and catch up with. <\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Okay, enough of that.&nbsp; Sorry for starting off your Tuesday with such muck.&nbsp; Obviously, I can do things to help myself deal with all of this.&nbsp; And, don&#8217;t worry, I have been praying.&nbsp; And I&#8217;m choosing to go out to dinner with some girls tonight (even though dinner in a public place is not the kind of connection I&#8217;m really in need of).&nbsp; Mostly I just needed to get it off my chest and out of my head.&nbsp; Thanks for listening&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Today I&#8217;m sort of down.&nbsp; And I have nothing else to blog about, so here&#8217;s my list of things I&#8217;m whining to myself about right now.&nbsp; I will get over it.&nbsp; But if you&#8217;re hoping for a happy blog, don&#8217;t &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/elhogue.com\/shannah\/2008\/08\/26\/down\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-532","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/elhogue.com\/shannah\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/532","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/elhogue.com\/shannah\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/elhogue.com\/shannah\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/elhogue.com\/shannah\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/elhogue.com\/shannah\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=532"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/elhogue.com\/shannah\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/532\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/elhogue.com\/shannah\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=532"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/elhogue.com\/shannah\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=532"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/elhogue.com\/shannah\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=532"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}