Sometimes I feel (okay, I know) that I am far too judgmental. I am critical of everything, which can sometimes be a good thing, but usually isn’t. This is especially true when I’m being negative about people (which is a lot of the time). <\/p>\n
I mean, I do have an ability to critique ideas, stories, people, movies, you-name-it to see their good points, flaws, and how to make them stronger. So sometimes, a critical eye can be positive. But mostly…I’m just critical.<\/p>\n
I’m super critical of myself, for starters. I’m not good enough. In my own mind, I’m not funny enough, popular enough, kind enough, godly enough, productive enough, good-mommy enough, good-wifey enough…in other words, I’m just not _______ enough, ever. (You can fill in that blank with just about anything and it would probably be true.)<\/p>\n
But even worse, I’m incredibly judgmental of others, too. Though most of my criticism doesn’t leave my mouth (which is scary considering how much of it does<\/span> leave my mouth!), I’m just far too easily annoyed by the “stupid” people out there and the “stupid” things they do. And of course, this usually just means that they got in my way, messed up my schedule or my plans, aren’t making me #1 in their lives, or generally aren’t doing things the way I wanted them done. <\/p>\n I’m definitely sensing the Spirit wanting to address my critical nature more these days. Not just all the nastiness that comes out (ie, complaining about family members to other family members, whining to my sister about my husband, griping to my husband about church or moms groups or friends or life in general), but the heart issue that results in all the judgment and (negative) criticism.<\/p>\n And that heart issue, in case you were wondering, is a lack of love. God’s kind of love. The one that makes people whole and holy and able to see beyond themselves so that God’s love can flow through them into others.<\/p>\n This morning, I read, in a book by Madeleine L’Engle, a quote from Coleridge:<\/p>\n And she quotes a French priest:<\/p>\n Such a love is what I need. I won’t go so far as to say that I want it yet. Because, honestly, I really still want my way, my life to go easily, my self to be most important. But that is the love that Jesus wants for me, in me, to send out to others through me. And so that is the love that I want to want, that I hope to have, that I desperately need. <\/p>\n Jesus, forgive my heart and critical heart. Teach me to love as you love.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Sometimes I feel (okay, I know) that I am far too judgmental. I am critical of everything, which can sometimes be a good thing, but usually isn’t. This is especially true when I’m being negative about people (which is a … Continue reading