That, it seems, is where we are. According to my doctor, there’s been no real change. So these babies seem to have no intention of coming. I realize this could change in a heartbeat, but still, it was pretty discouraging. After all, I’ve got at least 12 lbs. of babies (plus extras) to lug around, and I’m ready to be done.
So I’ve decided that I just have to stop focusing on it, rehearsing my woes on a regular basis. This is, of course, difficult since everyone, in the most well-meaning of ways, wants to know how I’m feeling. And sadly, all their, also well-meaning, reminders that “it’s almost over” and “once they come, it’ll all be worth it” just don’t really have the encouraging effect they’re intended to have. While absolutely true, those lines just don’t mean anything to a first-time mom who’s frustrated/uncomfortable enough to be told them. After all, for me, two weeks until the scheduled section just means 6 meals, 4 blood tests, an itching belly and a whole lot of physical discomfort for 14 more days. And once I start thinking that way, not surprisingly, my attitude takes a major nose-dive.
Yesterday, I was trying to figure out what my real issue was. The best I came up with was that my expectations are not matching reality at this moment. I’ve noticed this pattern before. Expectations can be a dangerous thing, especially subconscious ones. See, I never figured I’d go this far. My doctor mentioned 38 weeks as term way back at the beginning, but that number didn’t mean anything to me. And besides, “nobody” actually carries twins to 38 weeks, right? So I just didn’t expect to be still pregnant at this point. Yet I am. And I’m having trouble re-adjusting my radar to be okay with that. I definitely need to work on my expectations…
So, anyway, that’s my baby update. I’m at least starting today in a much better frame of mind than I’ve had for a few days. And as it’s Thanksgiving week, I’m trying to keep a thankful heart about all the blessings I have been given instead of letting the one fact of “still pregnant” ruin any thankfulness I could have. And who knows, these babies may decide to make an appearance long before Dec. 8 (I hope). Anything’s possible, right?
You poor chicken, I can’t imagine what’s it’s like with two in your tummy. You are doing so great to be where you are – well done girl.
it’s so hard to want them out but to be so out of control of when they make an appearance isn’t it. I will pray for you and your little ones that God might give you and I the patience we need to wait for these little ones to do their thing in their timing.
Enjoy thanksgiving my friend, here’s hoping the next two weeks go super fast!
Just prayed for you, Shannah. I don’t know what it feels like to be 36 weeks pregnant with twins, but I can imagine it requires a lot of patience and strength to get through each day! I encourage you to look for the small blessings before the babies come, like a silent, peaceful home or a firm belly. 🙂 And I’ve heard that the closer babies are to term/bigger they are, the better they tend to eat and sleep. Maybe this extra time now means you’ll all be sleeping through the night sooner! I’ll keep praying for you!
Just think about how much healthier those babies will be since they’re able to stay in Mama so long! A lot of twins end up having to spend a week or two in NICU, but yours will more than likely be ready to go home right away! Right now you are being the best Mama you can be…by providing the optimum environment for your babies’ growth. What a blessing!
Prayed for you just now, Shannah! You’re so wise to get rid of unrealistic expectations. And my water broke (trickled) with Livi out of NOWHERE (3 weeks early). My body had made NO progress. It just happened. You never know…
You’re right, expectations can often set us up for disappointment–I’m still learning this myself. Praying for God to fill you with comfort and encouragement today, Shannah! Asking Him to help you and me both to hope in Him!